mimi's adventures

It's around 2.30 am, it's Friday, it was supposed to be a big night out, one more farewell party, so typical in this country where people constantly come and go.

I'm not in the mood for party, as this time it's my good friends' farewell party, I am going to miss her horribly as she became a very good friend, my confident, the one who knew and kept my little secrets in a country where you struggle to have a private life.

I decide to go home earlier. I feel a bit pathetic, I couldn't help crying a bit during the party. She's leaving and it reminds me how in my world, once again, all relationships have expiry dates.

I am driving home on the beach road, feeling sorry for myself when suddenly I see siren lights, 2, no 3, wait 4...all throughout the beach road. First I think they are check points, am not drunk, have my papers...should be fine...

But it's not a check point. the road is blocked, I arrived at an intersection that I take everyday, there are GNR's (portuguese contingent part of the United Nations police force)everywhere, I recognize a few of them, it's such a little place Dili...
they are not wearing their tight shirts that underline their overly defined muscles and they don't look hot anymore, they are on duty, some of them look angry and violent, they have big grey guns, never seen those before. There is a group of them on my right shouting at someone on the floor....I can't really see what that group is doing. I can hear them crossing, violent movements, but i don't know for sure, I am in between something apparently, they look beyond me, two make signs at me, one of them recognizes me.

I danced with him once, at a portuguese party. He was shy and giggling nervously. He doesn't look shy anymore, or intimidated. He looks at me like he knows exactly what he's doing, he tells me to drive away, to take the other road. I probably look like a clueless silly girl, but he smiles, making me feel safe besides the unexpected cenario happening in front of me.

So I drive away and a few minutes later I arrive home safely like nothing happened. But I can't stop thinking about what I saw...how the only reason I felt safe was because of the nationality of the police, I could relate to them,which is weird. I think about how easily things can't get out of control here, how things are still so sensitive, there are so many tensions ...that can potentially become an open conflict and disturb the little bubble I live in...

In 2006 when everyone was talking about a potential crisis I didn't believe it would happen, now after the 2006 crisis, and maybe also with more mature eyes, I think anything can happen, this place can burst out in a day...I just hope it doesn't for the sake of the people, for the sake of my little self centered vision that this place still has a future, and can be a model of sucess...